Stable - G - for the 'That's So Wrong' Challenge

[nevcolleil.livejournal.com]

darkhavens inadvertantly inspired this :p It's BtVS...although I am not a BtVS person. So I hope I got my Anya voice right :) This is 500 words for the 'That's so Wrong' challenge.

Stable
rated: G
fandom: BtVS
pairing: there is het and slash implied (I hope that's okay).



disclaimer: BtVS belongs to Joss Whedon, et. al.

---

“Tell me I’m not seeing what I think I’m seeing…”

Willow nodded. “You’re seeing what you think you’re seeing.”

“I think she said-”

“Dawn.”

Buffy raised her face from her hands and looked around her, once again, at the…beings going about their business in her home.

There was a Giles reading in the corner. There was a Xander sitting on the couch. This wouldn’t have been disturbing…if there hadn’t been a Wesley drinking tea near Giles. And Spikes sitting on the couch with Xander.

Spikes. Plural.

One on each side, with the Xander in between them, practically nibbling on his ears. It was just so… so wrong.

“That’s-”

“Uh-huh.”

“And-”

“Yep.”

Buffy shook her head. “They’re-”

“Making me a fortune,” Anya’s voice replied this time, instead of Willow’s. Buffy, Willow, and Dawn turned as Anya entered the room looking…

Well. Like she’d made a fortune. And had spent it on her hair and shoes.

She also looked totally unapologetic about the small army of robots that seemed to have taken run of the Summers’ home.

“I know you have, you know, “issues” after that whole Buffybot thing,” she said to Buffy. “And I don’t blame you. That was sick.” Anya laughed. “I mean… you and Spike? Please.”

Buffy frowned. “I-”

“But then I thought - if Spike can get his jollies off a robot resembling a member of our little gang… Why shouldn’t the women of the world get the same privelege? Or the men. You know. I’m liberal.”

Anya wagged her fingers at her robots as they noticed her, a chorus of “Anya!“s breaking out around the room. “Face it, ladies,” she went on. “There are some fine male specimens in our acquaintance.”

Buffy and Willow exchanged looks, speechless.

“I hope it’s not an inconvenience. Having them stay here while the warehouse is fumigated. I’d take them to my place… But it’s simply much too small.” Anya plopped down on the couch between Spike one and the Xander. The robots shifted to accommodate her, smiling lovingly. “Plus, they’ll eat everything in the kitchen if you let them.” She paused, considering. “At least, I think that’s what they’ve been doing with the peanut butter. I practically own stock in Peter Pan about now.”

Buffy was working herself into a fury, but the former vengeance demon just smiled, sweetly.

“Buffy.”

“What?”

“There’s an Angel, too.”

Buffy froze, mouth opened wide to begin a tirade. It snapped shut.

“What?” she asked more softly.

Anya was grinning now, wolfishly. She wagged her eyebrows. “I told him he should wait up there for me. But I don’t think he’d mind if you went up instead. To, you know…show him around.”

Buffy blinked.

She turned on her heels and ran up the stairs.

“Can I come, too?”

“No!” Willow, Buffy, and Anya yelled at Dawn at once. Willow was actually impressed, until Anya said, “I’ve got someone else for you, Dawnie. Looks just like his father. Only a couple of hundred years younger.”

Willow sighed.

[ end. ]

Comments

[rayne-y-daze.livejournal.com]

Oh! I want a bot!! Pleeeeease?

[darkhavens.livejournal.com]

Oh my! A stableful of bots eh? *g*

I do so like the fact that Xander had the two Spikes nibbling on him. :D

Lovely!

[nevcolleil.livejournal.com]

I do so like the fact that Xander had the two Spikes nibbling on him.

:D I thought you might :)

Lovely

Thank you!

[phendog.livejournal.com]

Aww...*giggle* I want a free demo of the bots! Send them to live with me! *hee*

[nevcolleil.livejournal.com]

I want a free demo of the bots!

:D Hee hee. Don't we all ;P I've a feeling though that Anya wouldn't go for the idea of freebies...

[phendog.livejournal.com]

Well she's giving them away to Buffy and Dawn...

*pouts*

Besides how am I supposed to know if I want to buy before I test drive...every model.

[nevcolleil.livejournal.com]

It does seem unfair :P But then, what are the chances that any of us would ever give the bots back once Anya had let them out of her sight? ;)

[phendog.livejournal.com]

True...

*also considers how gross the demo shoes get at the shoe store and thinks of trying out the demo bot that's already been tested by several others before me*

Um, okay, ew...